Priorities.

If I had known three years ago that the clothes I would buy then would be the same clothes that I would still be wearing now, I wonder if I would have chosen differently... The clothes that i had once purchased for dates, parties, and dancing, are the same clothes that now get spit up on daily, are worn with leggings most days, and get washed with free and clear baby detergent.

College life is hard. We are so dang poor. I never could have guessed three years ago that I would be someday be living paycheck to paycheck from a part-time job at McDonalds. Not to mention relying on that same paycheck to provide for four people.

One of Brody's favorite activities is to go to the playland at the mall. He also enjoys running down the mall, past all of the store windows, and waving with his wild arm at all of the workers standing outside the storefronts. As I follow my little wondering man, I sometimes look at the mannequins dressed in the latest fashions and dream of the day that I can wear new clothes again, without guilt.

I remember before the days of marriage and responsibility, when I worked at American Eagle, I would spend my nearly every paycheck on clothes. And I wouldn't feel bad about it, at all. Now, when I see something cute that I'd love to get, a million thoughts go through my head about what else that money could, and should, go towards.

Don't get me wrong, I am not writing this post to sound sad and naked... I'm just writing my thoughts about the different lifestyle I live than the one I lived three short years ago. Actually, I can honestly say that I am so much happier now than ever before.

I may not have new fashionable clothes each new season. I may not have my nails done and a fresh pedicure each month. I may not have highlights in my hair and a fresh cut every six weeks. I may not have a membership at the local tanning salon. But you know what? I do have a lot of other things that I didn't have three short years ago.

I have a husband, one that works his butt off for our family every single day. I have a college degree, and absolutely no debt to go along with it. (Thanks to hard work and my parents.) I also have two adorable babies who needs always come first.

I feel so blessed everyday for the opportunity that Jeff and I have had to go and further our education. It is hard work and takes a lot of sacrifice, but the future goal of having a career that will allow us to live comfortably someday is in sight. I have to remind myself frequently of this goal or else it would be tempting to just quit.

Getting through Jeff's degree is first priority right now. We are also trying our best to get this done debt free. Therefore things like clothes, shoes, and other frivolities are not something we get to spend our money on right now.

And really, do we really need those things to live a fulfilling life? We have a working car, a warm apartment, and food to eat each day. We have a stroller to take our littles on lots of walks. We have toddler toys to help our Brody learn by playing with him on the floor of our small living room. We have a table to eat dinner at together each evening when Jeff gets home from school. We have a bed to cuddle our sweet Bonnie in each night. We have a couch to throw all the pillows off and make into a jungle gym when the weather is too cold to play outside. We have a hallway to run, laugh, and race down just for fun.

Living this simple life is teaching me a lot about priorities that I think will benefit me through the rest of my life, even when we are making a bit more money. Whether it is saving for trips, or paying off a future home, we will always have to budget for the things that we really want. We will also have to decide what those things are, and have to decide which things to give up. I am learning that in order to have money for the important things, you have to give up wanting other less important things.

I know that in the end of my life someday I will not look back and wish that I had more clothes or a better car. The things that will be most important to me then, will be the same things that are most important to me now. Therefore, I should stop wishing for these unimportant things. I should instead spend my time living in the moment with the things that truly matter in life.