Some things I want to remember...

The way Brody says, "Nooooo..." in his little sing-song voice. 

How when I'm holding Bonnie upright in my arms, she hugs me tightly and buries her face in my shoulder when she gets happy or excited at something. 

When Brody acts possessive over his toys, but then agrees to share one with Bonnie, even one of his favorites sometimes. He holds it close to her hand and waits as she eventually grabs it from him slowly. 

The way I can easily make Bonnie have a big smile when I say, "Bop, Bop, Bop." 

As we get ready to go somewhere, Brody is known to race to his room real quick, open up his sock drawer, and insist on wearing socks on his hands to wherever we are off to. 

How Brody says, "Hat-ie" for hat. And how he loves to wear some type of a hat most places (just like Dada), even if it is his bike helmet. 

How Bonnie likes being bounced to sleep each night in my arms. I commonly am seen bouncing my brains out at the edge of couch while watching TV in the evenings with Jeff.

The way Brody puts one hand in his high chair tray and says, "Upee" to let is know that he wants a snack. 

The only time Brody will snuggle (aside from being sick) is when he is playing a game on my phone. He will sit on my lap and lay back against my body. This is a time I give him many kisses. 

He curls and crosses his toes when he plays phone games too. His toes melt my heart. 

When Bonnie is all wrapped up in her swaddler, many times her tiny fingers stick out of the bottom of the arm wrap part. They tickle my stomach when I'm feeding her or cuddling her. 

When Bonnie reaches her arms out to touch my face. Her hands are the softest and when she touches me with her small, gentle fingers, it gives me the sweetest feeling.

Brody gives Bonnie kisses. This doesn't happen all of the time, but when it does, he bends down, puckers his little lips, and gives her a quick kiss on the top of her head. It's adorable and makes me really happy. 

Just let me tell you a bit about my little girl...

This little girl is perfect to me- from her cute round cheeks to her slightly turned up nose- I love her so so dearly. Dearly is a cliche word, I know, but it describes my love for her with exactness. I just want to squeeze her up and never let her go. 

She is so understanding, even at a young age of almost six months. With being a second child, she has learned to be patient quickly. 

While her brother is a daddy's boy through and through, I'm fully enjoying the fact that she seems to be favoring me. I'll hold her and love her as much as I can for I know that at some point that all might change a bit. 

She likes to sleep in later than anyone else in the house. (Well, later than Brody, which means when he is up, Jeff and I are up... Not so much by choice.) When I hear her sweet coo on the monitor I always walk in to see my happy little girl laying on our bed in the middle of all of our blankets. It's my favorite sight- her excited little smile. 

She still fits in my wrap. Oh thank goodness, because holding her close to my body gives me one of my favorite feelings in the world. Whether she is sleeping there, or just hanging out, she's content. And so am I- we have each other. 

I'm so grateful for this beautiful little girl. She is starting to develop a sense of humor and making her laugh is my new favorite hobby.

Bonnie Cait. I love that I get to call her my daughter forever.

Each evening I hold her until she's fast asleep in my arms. And while I know that I am not creating perfect habits, I just like knowing that she comfortable in my arms, and if that is how she wants to fall asleep right now, then that is okay. My baby girl won't be this small, sweet size forever. I will cherish these sweet sleepy moments. My little girl.

Two Years of Being a Momma

Brody,

You are two years old today. I could easily write about how this time has went by so fast and how I can't believe you are a two whole years old already... But actually, two years feels just about right. 

... I'm so thankful for that. 

When you were handed to me on that memorable evening that I became a mom, my life changed. My life became a bit slower and a bit more important. Each day since the day you were born I'm reminded constantly of how time passes with or without me noticing. I never want to stop noticing time passing while I am a mom.

I am not about to say that each moment of motherhood is packed full of rainbows and butterflies, but I will say each moment is filled with lessons and memories. I am so thankful I get to have so many memories with you as a part of them.

Brody, you have changed my life for the better. Before becoming a mom there were so many things I was unsure of. Would I continue my education? Would I start a career? Would I live in the city? Would I start my own business? Would I speed on the highway? Would I cheat on a test? Many, many things were harder for me back then, until I became your mom. As you were placed in my arms that day, two years ago, the stars aligned for the first time in my life. Things became clearer when I became your mom.

Life immediately felt different that day. As I felt your soft skin and looked into your perfect little eyes, I realized that I was important. I thought I knew what importance was before, but that day I learned a whole new meaning of the word. The responsibility, patience, and integrity that comes within that word was clear to me at that moment. 

From that day on, my life became about you. These past two years I've lived this new, wonderful, life of motherhood. A day hasn't passed that I haven't been able to kiss your sweet face or hug your cute little body. 

I know that someday will come that this won't be possible. You'll move away from the comfort of our home and perhaps a call on the phone is the closest thing I'll have to a goodnight hug. I hope with all my heart that when that day comes, I can look back and know that I did my best to make each day count. I hope that I can say that time went by as fast as it should. I hope that I won't feel too sad that that chapter is over, but rather I hope I will feel comfort knowing I was blessed with the experience of motherhood. 

Brody, you made me a mommy. And for that, I am so thankful. It's the most important role I could ever hold during this life. Learning how to raise you is the hardest thing I have ever had to do. But at the same time, it's the most rewarding thing I've get been able to experience. 

Today I was teaching you how to push, one at a time, the peddles on the new little red tricycle we got you for your Birthday. I would repeat push, push, push over and over to help remind you what we were doing in order for you to move down the sidewalk. Every so often I would let go of the front of your bike and you would be moving, all on your own, until you would forgot again and you would come to stop. Your cute little face,under your helmet, would look up at me wondering what we were supposed to do next. And we would start again.

I love being that person you look up to when you get unsure of something. As your mom, I want to be a person worth looking up to. As we travel down the sidewalk of life together, I promise to always be there to remind you and help you along the way. 

I love you little bee. Happy Birthday! I have loved the past two years of my life and you are to thank for that.

Love,

Momma