kids who are close in age

I always imagined I would have my kids close in age. But, half way through Bonnie's (my second) pregnancy, I began to get nervous. What the heck was I thinking? 4 months ago, I was convinced that Brody would be SO big by the time a new baby would arrive. However, he was not growing that fast, and he was still very much a baby himself. But, the deed was done, our second baby would be coming in 5 short months, whether we were ready or not.

I'm not going to lie, having an 18 month old and an infant wasn't super easy, but I found that I adjusted quickly (enough) and embraced being a momma of two babies shortly after. At the same time though, in those beginning weeks, I was sure that we would stop at two kids. It was a lot, and I felt like I was at my max.

Here we are, half way through our third pregnancy. I don't feel the anxiety that I did while pregnant with Bonnie. I know to expect things to feel crazy at first, but I also know that they will eventually calm down and things will seem to fall into place once again.

As I watch Brody and Bonnie grow up together, I become more and more thankful that we did decide to have them so close in age. Play dates with friends is great, but it is so hard to coordinate with other family's schedules, nap times, and more. But when you have at least two kids, play dates aren't as necessary (still wonderful, but not necessary all the time). You can go to the park, spur of the moment, and know that your kids will at least have one friend to play with.

I remember, and I still sometimes do, hoping that there would be a friend Brody's age that would add some excitement to our days at the park. Those times, when instant buddies are there, is wonderful, but when it doesn't work out that way, Brody and Bonnie always have each other.

The other cool thing I've noticed about this growing sibling relationship is that Brody really does fully enjoy Bonnie's company. He doesn't care so much for other kids that are Bonnie's age, really at all, but Bonnie truly is his very  best friend. It makes my heart melt. "Baby, want to go on the high slide?" "Baby, let's go play! Want to go play?" "Baby, come on!" And Bonnie follows, as fast as her little legs can take her. Brody walks at her pace and always makes sure that she's safe. "Baby, not that way, too high." "Baby, don't fall. Okay, baby? Careful!"

It's truly wonderful to be able to take the kids to the park, sit on the bench, and just watch them interact, play, and grow up together.

I know that there are probably many wonderful things about having kids further apart, and I know that those sibling relationships are just as special, in so many ways as well. But I am so happy with this life Jeff and I have chosen. This is our life, Brody and Bonnie's life, and it just feels right.

With another baby on the way, I'm anticipating the craziness. I am. But at the same time, this baby feels right. I know that Brody and Bonnie are going to love this one just as much as they love each other. Bonnie has been obsessed with babies lately and always wants to look at babies on my phone, aka my newsfeed. She gets big, excited eyes, each time another baby comes up, looks me straight in the face, and says, "Baby!! Baby! Momma, baby!" And I have to agree with her, that it is indeed a baby, before we can continue our browsing for more babies.

This momma-life, it really is a good life.